Football Friday: Two for the Money!

Last Week: W (Saints +2.5)
Season: 7-3-1

Let's follow Fitzy to the bank! 

Seven Weeks. 

Seven Wins. 

This is what I feel like. 

The great philosopher Bodhi once said, "If you want the ultimate, you gotta be willing to pay the ultimate price." So, like I did in week six, I'm giving the leisuralites two winners in the same week. The only difference is the two this time around are favorites [rather than dogs]. 

Bengals @ Chiefs:  Andy Dalton will avenge his week five egg that cost us and stick it to the hapless Chiefs. KC is 0-4 at home against the spread [ATS] and the Bengals are 2-2 on the road ATS. The Chiefs are terrible and eyeing that number-one draft pick already while the Bengals are better than their 4-5 record indicates, coming off a blowout against the Giants at home. Skeptics might say this is 'trap game' for the Bengals after last week, I don't buy it. Bengals -3

Packers @ Lions:  Greg Jennings is out. Clay Matthews is out. Charles Woodson is out. Donald Driver and Jordy nelson are the walking wounded. As long as Aaron Rodgers is healthy and Randall Cobb is running around that fast indoor track, I like the Packers to get their Tenth win in the last 11 games between these two teams. Packers -3

Football Friday: Who Dat?!

Last Week: W (Bucs +1.5)
Season: 6-3-1

Did I see Doug Martin having the baller second half that he did? Of course not. Did I start him in Fantasy? Fuckin'-A right I did! To the tune of 91.2 points in my league (we have big play bonuses).

Vilma and Brees will both have to shine for a W

I'm 6-0 my last six weeks. Time to put my undefeated streak against another one. I'm taking the New Orleans Saints (+2.5) at home against the undefeated Atlanta Falcons.

Let's take a look at the career numbers for the Brees v Matty Ice rivalry that started back in 2008.

• Brees is 6-2 vs the Falcons since Matty Ice became the starter. Throwing for an average of 319 yards a game, completing 68% of his passes with 19 TDs and 10 INTs.
• Ryan is 2-6 in the matchup, but he did win one of those games in New Orleans. A 27-24 overtime thriller. 
• Other than that, Ryan hasn't been the reason for his teams inability to beat the Saints. He has thrown for an average of 280 yards a game, completing 59% of his passes with 10 TDs and 5 INTs.

Brees has clearly had Matty Ice's number. I think you have to be intrigued by getting the saints as a dog at home after that Monday night performance. I thought the Saints were going down last week, but I was dead wrong. Last week they played a lot like the team that was 13-3 last year and won a championship in the 2009 season. They ran the ball effectively, put pressure on the quarterback, created turnovers, and Drew Brees played his typical A-game.

I think it's possible that Steve Spagnolo finally got through to his defense. While I attribute a lot of those QB pressures to an inept Philly offensive line, I think it's a step in the right direction. Jonathan Vilma is back to quarterback the D and knows this Atlanta offense well. Will they have the same success against Atlanta? Probably not, but I think given the way the Falcons barely beat the Cowboys last week, they're probably due for a cooler. I still think the Falcons are a better team and will win the next matchup when they meet again in the Georgia Dome. But for now, I am going with the team that looked more impressive last week, cannot afford to lose, and has home field in this rivalry.

Plus my fantasy team needs a big game out of Brees. Saints +2.5

Football Friday: Avast Ye Matey!

Last Week: W (Giants -2)
Season: 5-3-1

The great philosophers Ma$e & Puff ripped-off the phrase, "Bad, bad, bad, bad boys you make me feel so good." and this week it rings true. TLS heads west (TV's all up in the head rests) for the Pirate Bowl! Tampa Bucs at the Oakland Raiders.
Many NFL fans perceive these teams playing poorly because of the record within their respective conferences, but I like this young Bucs squad under [first year coach] Greg Schiano. [RB] Doug Martin is a future stud and [QB] Josh Freeman is looking more & more comfortable each passing week in his new offense.  He's finally hitting [Big Free Agent Signing/WR] Vincent Jackson for some big downfield plays and the occasional touchdown. Freeman has also rekindled some his magic late in games with [WR] Mike Williams. 

Martin dominated the Vikings D last week

The Raiders are coming off a win against the Chiefs, which means virtually nothing. They're giving up a point and a half (-1.5) because they're at home, half of the obligatory three-point home-field advantage. Smells funky in Oakland, and it's not the black hole. 

The Bucs have let a few leads slip in the second half of games earlier in the season, but I think they're starting to come together in all three phases of the game. Their defense will contain [RB] Darren McFadden and while Carson Palmer might hit [WR] Denarius Moore for a few big plays, it won't be enough over four quarters to top the Bucs. Plus, look at the records against the spread [ATS]:

Bucs and the points [+1.5] because Raiders end up settling for a lot of Sebastian Janokowski field-goals.

Football Friday: New World Order

Last Week: W (Texans -6.5)
Season: 4-3-1

As the weeks progress, odds makers become sharper. Typically, after week 6 or 7, the wise guys show their true colors and start impacting lines as early as a Wednesday. There hasn't been much movement this week. The Patriots versus Rams in London is interesting (Pats -7) because there is no true "home-field advantage", but the travel/time could affect the teams and the Patriots' defense doesn't look like it can hold a 7-point lead. 

The only other QB I'd put my money behind this week (and it sickens me) is Eli Manning. The Giants are 2-point favorites, on the road, in Dallas. Looking at the stats against the spread [ATS], things look pretty pedestrian.

But Dallas, at home, with similar stats, isn't getting the obligatory three points? 

This line is BEGGING people to put their money on Romo & Co! Well I'm not taking the bait. No Demarco Murray in the backfield and no Sean Lee or DeMarcus Ware for Dallas?! 

Giants -2

Woo! 4-3-1 Baby.

Way to back me up, Texans: 43-13 on a 6.5-point line? I'm back on the good foot! 

Football Friday: Separation Sunday

Last Week: 2-0
Season: 3-3-1

That great Ric Flair once said, "Woo! I'm Back..."

That's how I feel after last Sunday and Monday nights. Sure I played two games, but desperate times called for desperate measures. Rodgers and Manning got me feeling like a phoenix, rising from those early-season ashes. Let's keep it rolling. 

The weirdest line of the week is the Saints (-2.5) giving points, on the road, to their division-rival [Bucs]. I love the Bucs in that game, but wouldn't put my money near it because of the scandalous line. The Saints defense is atrocious, but the Bucs secondary is equally bad (31st in the league). 

Trust me as a Patriots fan: watching a shitty secondary squander your offense's (i.e. stellar quarterbacking) effort sucks. Never mind putting your money behind it. 

Using what I've learned the past seven weeks, I had to find a good quarterback and defense with a favorable line/situation. Ravens @ Texans (-6.5). Matt Schaub, the two-headed backfield of Foster and Tate, and a formidable defense (even without MLB Brian Cushing) at home are a solid play. 

Add to the aforementioned that the vaunted Ravens defense is in shambles without Ray Lewis, [CB] Ladarius Webb, and a banged-up Haloti Ngata, there are holes in every layer of that defense. The Texans have the talent to exploit all of them in front of their home crowd. 

And most importantly:

Look at the team's record Against the Spread (ATS). Good luck this week!

Gotcha Bitches!

Down 24 points?

Largest Comeback in Monday Night Football History

Largest Comeback in Peyton Manning's History.

Another Festivus Miracle for Fitzy! .500 Bitches!

One Down, One to Go!

Football Friday: Two Dog Night

Last Week: L Dolphins @ Bengals (-3)
Season: 1-3-1

If you're reading this post, you must have been betting against me, thrusting yourself into a cash windfall, because I suck this year. 

I recognize my mistakes though; I've been backing sub-par quarterbacks on close lines. It always keeps things close until the end of the games, but it's also a great way to induce a heart attack and lose money.

Samson, I'm sorry.....

So the only logical thing to do to try and get some of this money back is to put it behind great quarterbacks. Luckily for us there are two that are underdogs this week! 

The Best Advice

Think about it. Seriously. Were you thrust into the cycle by your parents and, if so, will you continue it? 

The Reflection

He sat down at one of the tables facing East 41 Street, popped the lid off his coffee, and lit a cigarette. 

"Ain't life fuckin' grand," he thought, his face briefly lit up in an orange reflection behind his hand, then emerging behind a thick plume of rich tobacco smoke. He stared beyond the sea of suits and dresses, topcoats and tote-bags, the incessant click-clacking of expensively cobbled footwear. He flicked some ash onto the sidewalk, watching the gray snowflakes disintegrate into the morning commute hustling by him. 

He knew he shouldn't have come down here, and now it was being thrown in his face. He had helped move her into her new apartment, gone out of his way to make her comfortable, tried to quell some of the nervous excitement that comes with a new start, but why?

"God, I'm a such a fuckin' moron," he said to himself. "You should've let it go naturally. Just ended it when she got the job instead of trying to manipulate everything and make it perfect. You both knew it wasn't going to work. Now you're sitting on a cast-iron chair thinking about the eight-hour trek back home while she gets ready for the first day of her new life. Nice job, asshole."

The long, sustained blast of a trumpet from the cafe speakers grabbed his attention. A slow, deliberate note, which gave way to the piano, bass, and accompanying horn section in a playful exchange. He knew the song: The Stolen Moment by Eddie 'Lockjaw' Davis. He had first heard it freshman year of college. Musicology 124: The Evolution of Jazz, the easiest class of that semester. Probably the most beneficial too, since it helped him bed numerous co-eds along with a well-timed joint concluding the night's debaucheries. He thought about some of those girls. Women now; some with a husband, kids, responsibility. 

He stood up and stomped on the soggy filter, rubbing it into the sidewalk; the last disgusting reminisce of his latest failure. He checked his watch and headed Northeast towards Grand Central. 

Football Friday: Butter Me Up

Last Week: W Bengals (-2.5) over Jags

Season: 1-2-1

Miami Dolphins @ Cincinnati Bengals (-3):

I have to back Big Red (Andy Dalton) yet again because I know where my bread's been buttered the last couple weeks: betting against Miami and supporting the Bengals! 

Turn it off. It's burning my retina.

The Bengals are getting the obligatory, home-field, three-point advantage and will win this game for the exact same reasons they beat Jacksonville (see previous post). Add that to the fact that Miami won't get a herculean game like last week from WR Brian Hartline (he set the record for "points scored by a white receiver" in one of my fantasy leagues with 64+ points against Arizona's secondary), they've only beaten the Raiders, and they're 0-2 on the road. 

Time to get back to .500 

Football Friday: Comin' Around

I didn't give the refs a standing ovation last night, but I'm glad the bullshit from the first three weeks is over. When $250 million dollars switches sides on the final play of Monday Night Football because of the refs, changes need to be made. 

That said, I got a push out of the Jets, in overtime, against Miami. I needed to get that losing stink off me. Watching Sanchez and Sons struggle to put away the Dolphins after injuring Reggie Bush early was 4-plus hours of head-shaking. 

Now that receivers can't beg for pass-interference on every pass over 20 yards, I feel like things are starting to come around in my favor. 

Last Week: Push (Jets -3)

Anyone looking for a receiver? 

Season: 0-2-1

Cincinnati Bengals (-2.5) @ Jacksonville Jaguars: 
The Bengals rush defense isn't that good and MJD looks to be in shape for the Jags, but Andy Dalton, AJ Green, Jermaine Gresham, and the Bengals offense can put points on the board quickly. Blaine Gabbert and Justin Blackmon are still developing and not only getting comfortable in the offense, but with each other as well. I don't see the Jags keeping up with the Bengals. 

FML! Is it Football Friday already?!

Lookin for MIRACLE!

No NFL team wants to start off 0-2 and picking games is no different. I'm embarrassed. I'm punch drunk, on my last legs, looking for a miracle. But like Jerry once told George, "If everything you know is wrong, that means the opposite would have to be right!" Gold.

Why not adopt a little Costanza into my life. It can't get any worse. 

Last Week: L 
Season: 0-2


NY Jets (-3) @ Dolphins:

I'm backing The Sanchize and Tebow not so much because I like them as I'm betting against the Dolphins. All the games on the board this week are close, which means the oddsmakers saw the craziness of week 2 and made severe adjustments. The largest line is New Orleans -8.5 over KC Chiefs, followed closely by Dallas -8 over Tampa Bay. I actually kind of like Tampa Bay this year as my NFC team because of Schiano being a former Hurricane and I have Josh Freeman and Doug Martin on my fantasy team. Judging by my recent stink over the last couple weeks, I don't want to jinx them, so the Jets are the pick of the week. My Dolphin fans/friends should be happy about this.....

Football Friday

Last Week: L
Season: 0-1

Arizona Cardinals @ New England Patriots (-13.5)

Patriots should score at least 35 points on EVERY NFL defense. Arizona is coming East for a 1 o'clock game and they're starting Kevin Kolb. That's it. Patriots all day even if this line got up to 16.5!

Hope you didn't put the mortgage on Buffalo

I didn't start CJ Spiller either, despite picking Buffalo, and he went off for 38 points in my league. The good news? Fred Jackson can't walk anymore so CJ's the #1 back! Woo. Hit the music:

Football Friday!

*Betting on Sports is illegal throughout most of the United States and should be practiced legally in places with proper licenses*

I've done football previews in the past, maybe some of you have read them, but with the abundance of websites out there giving you their expertise, I've decided to put my money where my mouth is (again). 

Every Friday, for the rest of the season, I will provide ONE pick, against the spread, that is the best on the board. I say it every season: Anyone can pick a winner, but a winner can pick against the spread. I was 8-3 [ATS] in the playoffs last year (look it up on here). 

Friday gives you time to jump on the line if you like it, or do your own research, think about it, and see if it the line shifts in your favor before the game. 

Week 1:

Buffalo (+3) @ NY Jets

Buffalo wins the game outright, on the road, while possibly injuring The Sanchize, simultaneously setting off Tebow-mania and ESPN creating their new channel, The Ocho, featuring weekly physical challenges between Sal Palantonio, Shelley Smith, and Ed Werder* to see who covers Tebow for the week, starting with his morning piss. 

*I got Shelly Smith beasting Sal Pal & E-Dub, especially when she gets back up to her playing weight. Plus she's got more sexual flame burning in her than Fireman Ed. Couple that with her physique and Tebow is gator-bait.

Why I Hate Politics

I was reading an article on Mitt Robot’s running mate, Paul Ryan, and a particular paragraph struck me:

Ryan consults with a stable of conservative economists and scholars, including John Taylor, a Stanford University economist who has had posts in three GOP administrations. He has long praised the works of Ayn Rand, the Russian-born writer who strenuously championed an unfettered capitalism hinged to individual rights and responsibility, but in recent days has distanced himself from her, citing her atheism. -via the associated press' Paul Ryan's ideas nurtured by top conservatives by Alan Fram 

Seriously? This is what’s so fucked with politics. You can’t endorse a literary genius because you might lose some conservative (mainly christian) voters?! How about upholding the constitutional separation between church and state? Remember that part? It’s written in the FIRST AMENDMENT!!!

The Bill of Rights, Constitution, and other written documents were constructed by our forefathers (not your fathers, GOP) to create a, everyone say it together: Democracy! That means acknowledging the progress we’ve made through Supreme Court decisions (i.e. Rowe vs. Wade) made by a panel of presidentially-appointed judges, some who've tried decades of important trials.

Maybe you should’ve spent more time paying attention in elementary school history class and less time looking at the sky. And if there is a God who rules supreme, he doesn’t wear dad jeans, hide tax returns, and avoid alcohol & caffeine.

The Lump Above Your Ass

I’m Fitzy, I’m a bartender, and I hate August.

Working on Cape Cod, the middle two weeks of August are a nightmare. It’s like everybody realized Summer is ending and they have unfinished business, if only everyone else would get out of their way so they could hurry up! (Manhattanites are particially to blame for this, as the finance sector takes their vacation during this time and expects the surrounding world to realize this and conspire to their every demand. On behalf of the rest of us, Go Fuck Yourselves.)

Besides priding myself on professionalism, I get to do quite a bit of people-watching  during the Summer and I’ve figured out a way for everyone to improve their experience (and life).

PLAN BETTER!

Or as Jimmy Dugan would say, “Use your head! That’s the lump three feet above your ass!”

It boggles my mind how pissed off people get when their frustration could be avoided by taking a few minutes to think about the situation before engagaing. One way to do that is to conciously be in the moment, be observant, and make sound decisions based on the aforementioned.

You have no one to blame but yourself if you’re so concerned with the speed of something that you ignore the obvious. While technology has made things more accessible at a faster rate, it doesn’t translate to people making the same progress with their brains. It results in lazier people making worse decisions at a faster rate.

Stop staring into the cell phone or GPS, be aware of your surroundings, and use that lump three feet above your ass.

Ice, (ice) Baby!

Summertime is a nice reminder about the importance of ice in your cocktails. Esquire's Elizabeth Gunnison takes a look and unveils, "The Truth About the Fancy Ice in Your Drink"

Here are some cool alternatives for your house. Good for after work or your next fiesta. 

And if you're the [George] Thorogood type, then for $21 you can get yourself the Roller Rock Glass. It's a specially designed glass that keeps the (included) ice globe orbiting around your favorite drink without diluting it. Very cool. 

Girls Night Out

At first I only saw two. They walked in, cautiously; eyes glazed over, slowly panning the room, clearly looking for another person. They explained their story in an excited panic to the closest employee. Was it their first time going out to a restaurant? One made a move towards the bar. She stopped. No one in her group followed after her first two steps. She doubled back, said something quickly, then shepherded a herd of friends over to the bar. They took up space discussing their past decade of exploits. No one looked at a menu, sign, drink list or ordered anything for three to five minutes. The incessant talking over one another dried their mouths out, eventually forcing them to make a decision. 

The first one ordered a water (with lemon if the restaurant had those). The next four ordered the same glass of wine instead of the bottle. The next two order mojitos (or another fruit/vegetable-infused drink that required at least seven steps to make). The last one asked the bartender six to seven questions about various alcohols, then specialty drinks, asked if she could invent something, then settled on raspberry stoli, sprite, and a splash of cranberry. 

When presented with the bill, they asked for separate checks. They each paid with a credit card. They discussed how to tip while leaving a trail of paper, gum-filled napkins, fruit, straws, and the potpourri of designer perfume in their wake. 

At the other end of the bar, a few women sat, eyeing the night's offerings. One sipped dark booze on the rocks; another, a dirty martini. The last one: a glass of white wine. The took turns slightly shaking their heads, an occasional "tssk" coming from the group. 

A bachelorette party came bursting through the door. The bride-to-be wore an inflatable headband, complete with a giant penis protruding from her forehead, making her look like some neo-unicorn-centaur creature. 

I finished my beer and left. I had to find another bar. 

Kate Upton Wet T-Shirt GIF (might shut down the interweb) [NSFW]

Here's the full video from the July issue of GQ [1:13-on is NSFW]


and now the best .GIF ever:

Where does Jungle Bird rank amongst the animal-calling Greats?

After a horribly anti-climatic US Open in which Webb Simpson waited in the clubhouse and watched the popular choices fade into mediocrity, those who didn't turn over to Game 2 of the NBA Finals were treated to this gem:



"Jungle Bird" is apparently on a mission to stop deforestation. CNN's Jeanne Moos got the exclusive interview below, where Jungle Bird admits he didn't get in trouble!

ESPN: The Worldwide Hype Machine

Still guilty of Frosted Tips

When the "Not Guilty" verdict was read in the Roger Clemens steroid trial last night, I barely looked at the TV. I didn't care. The government, once again, wasted American tax dollars looking like they had never prosecuted anyone with a decent defense lawyer. Clemens spent a portion of his career earnings to preserve his legacy and hopefully get into Cooperstown.

Since Congress began investigating sports, absolutely nothing has changed except the lawyers' income. 

Clemens, the pitcher that [former Red Sox GM] Dan Duquette said, "was in the twilight of his career" [when he traded Clemens to the Toronto Blue Jays] got older, and statistically better, joining only Barry Bonds in the 'fine wine' section of the Baseball Hall of Fame. A more appropriate name should be the 'whine cellar' after these two arrogant bastards acted like they were wrongfully charged, despite barely being able to fit a hat on over their watermelon-sized noggins.

The only reason I've made any of these personal judgements was because of ESPN: The Worldwide Leader in Sports Hype. Sportscenter showcased complete games by the aging 'Rocket' and 400-plus-foot bombs smacked into the San Francisco stratosphere by Bonds, all the while, remarking on the feasibility of the accomplishment without a hint of irony. 

...Don't forget to tune into Sunday Night Baseball, Inter-league play, as Roger Clemens and the Yankees go up against Barry Bonds and the Giants. Hopefully, neither one outgrows their hat during the course of the game. Only on ESPN...

Fast-forward almost a decade and ESPN leads the coverage of the trial. They interview (their legal 'expert') Lester Munson and he goes on some diatribe about how blind baseball is and how the facts clearly point to a certain verdict. Six weeks later he appears again to compliment the defense team and their strategy on a well-fought victory. 

The proverbial elephant remains standing in the Sportscenter studio. 

What better way to observe this phenomenon than with the NBA Finals.

The Hemingway Daiquiri :: Father's Day Special

It's getting warmer out and some people need a new drink. Nothing better than going back to an old classic. Don't even think about taking out the blender either, because that was never Big Ern's style. My Dad introduced me to it when I was assigned my first book report.

"His [Hemingway] sentences are short and to the point. His books aren't too long and he tells great stories from around the world. He also go so shitfaced living down in Key West, he ripped a urinal out of the wall and installed it in his house. You can see it on the tour, you might have to request it though."

Cheers to 'Papa' Hemingway for doctoring up this Cuban favorite. It supposedly originated in a bar near Daiquiri Beach, which was frequented by US Soldiers stationed at a nearby base. The boys brought the drink back to some officers in Washington, D.C. and the rest is history. JFK was also rumored to like his Daiquiris the Heming-way with maraschino liqueur & grapefruit juice. JFK preferred his women...nevermind.

slightly different rocks version

The Hemingway Daiquiri:

• 2 1/2 oz white rum
• 1/2 oz maraschino liqueur (such as Luxardo, splash of cherry juice is ghetto, but works)
• 1/2 oz grapefruit juice
• 3/4 oz lime juice
• 3/4 oz simple syrup (aka sugar water)

Mix all ingredients into a cocktail shaker with ice and strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with choice of cherry or lime. 

Ancho Chile Short Ribs

Since TLS is back, I'm hungry. And so is my Dad. So resident chef, Christine Collins of the Cedar Kitchen (in Phili), has offered up this simple, meaty gem. I think I'm doing this on the grill tomorrow for the final round of the US Open. 

Here is how this whole thing got started… I knew I wanted to grill red meat, I knew I wanted something spicy, and I also knew I wanted it cheap! I decided I would make carne asada (basic translation: grilled meat) served with corn tortillas and a simple guacamole and salsa. When I got to the grocery I checked out the prices at the butcher, and guess what was the cheapest cut of meat? …Boneless short ribs! Woo hoo! I think people get nervous BBQ’n short ribs, but it’s pretty much just like any other steak. The great thing is it’s almost fool proof because it’s hard to overcook these suckers! They need a bit more time on the grill, which takes the pressure of you worrying about the perfect timing to flip it (awesome!) To make the marinade I used a dried ancho chile (which my lovely friend Ketki had left me!) it really added a smoky and spicy element to everything. The key is toasting up the peppers and then soaking them in hot water for about 10 minutes. Then all you need to do is blend them with some lime juice, cilantro, garlic and a little bit of onion – done! The ribs came out juicy and tangy with a little bit of heat…it was like cutting through warm “meat butter!” …Mmm…meat butter…. -Christine 

Click Here for the Ancho Short Ribs Recipe. Cheers! 

 

Has Erin Andrews Jumped the Shark?

Deadspin just released this article, ahem, highlighting Erin Andrews' career at ESPN and revealing that no network wants wants to hire her. It seems that after the infamous peephole video, accusing an ESPN executive of jerking-off to her on a plane, dating rumors involving men eight years her junior, hanging out & tweeting with BFFs/Supermodels Brooklyn Decker and Chrissy Teigen, and flashing her assets off so much that it warrants viewer-polls, news outlets have shied away from the sideline reporter. 

The biggest reason competing networks are staying away, besides the aforementioned? Andrews doesn't have much talent. A rival TV executive said,  "She can't host. There's no next step. And she wants more than sideline reporting, but there's no next step. It doesn't have anything to do with the scandal stuff. That's what gives her a higher profile," the exec said. "I just don't think she's that talented."


What say you, leisuralites? Talented reporter or tits on a stick? 

Summertime...and the Style is Easy.

I read GQ, Esquire, blogs, etc. and voluntarily expose myself to their preaching on "what's stylish" while occasionally stumbling across some great articles. I've written it too many times on this blog, but can't say it enough. It's all you. Style is so personal that the more you're interested in, the more interesting you become and it shows in everything you choose to do.


There are, however, basic fundamentals in everything. Menswear is no different. One good rule of thumb is, "If you don't have fit, you don't have shit." Whether you're going out with friends, on a date, on a boat (sans flippy-floppies), on a weekend trip, friggin' anywhere, the can't miss outfit is a well-fitting polo shirt and shorts. It's that easy to go from looking dorm-room swag to having your shit together. It could even get you out of a rough situation from the night before.


Por Ejemplo:

Notice where the sleeves hit, not hanging below the elbow like weekend golfer

Even China's dogs are smarter

More appropriate: Owner guards dog from restaurant? 

Lance 2.0

Remember when I told these guys to chill? Perfect example of why we don't need to share the road. We give them the whole thing for a few hours and they almost take out innocent civilians. They'll probably bitch that we should share the sidewalk too. 


Kudos to the 4th or 5th rider who coasts in, runs over a guy on the ground, and proceeds to flip himself over the handlebars. Pfffttt. 

TLS Endorses: The Better iPhone Case

The iPhone is a thing of beauty; a digital swiss-army knife whose superior technology is only overshadowed by its sleek design.

So why do most people take the iPhone's best feature away by putting it in an otter box? You're not Bear Grylls, right?

With Summer approaching, here are two alternatives to keep your pockets happy while you shed layers (in style, obviously). Both are extremely slim and provide a nice, tacky grip so you don't drop your phone. If you don't drop your phone, you can drop the bulky box case.

J.Crew Leather iPhone Case $38:

J.Crew Rubber iPhone Case $25:

Bob Marley says, "Happy 420"

Jesus, Bunnies, and Family. Oh My!

Somewhere between a huge spread of food, Bubba Watson winning the Masters, more people in the house than ever before, and a few bottles of wine, it hit me; this is what it's all about. I don't ever remember Easter being a huge holiday, but this year it was really fun. With all the people in attendance at my parent's house, including my almost-two-year-old nephew bombing around, it was like Thanksgiving in the Spring. And to think I spent the first 18 years of my life trying to get away from these people! They make the holidays fun, especially when we're trying to figure out how Jesus' rising like the Phoenix Suns morphed into a bunny who shares common characteristics with pedophiles. Embrace your family. You're stuck with them, so make the best of it. 

For all the Jewish leisuralites out there, sorry you were stuck with the shank bone and matzoh, guess they're pissed about anything rising up over the weekend, huh? 

Oh. Do I have your attention now?

Alec Baldwin got a Best Supporting Actor nomination for these seven and half minutes. He deserved the whole effing award. I watch this video for many reasons: it inspires me, it makes me laugh, and it reinforces how thankful I am to not be hawking something or someone.

The point is that sales is a tough racket (upends drink gesture) because anyone who can keep their sanity and perspective in such a bullshit environment deserves a medal. It's an environment based on insecurity, both inside and outside the team. There's always a constant pitching of everything to anyone who will listen (i.e. money, lifestyles, dreams, and ironically, security). A materialistic undertone equates branding to success. Never mind individual style, you should be a human billboard for Gucci, Versace, D&G, Armani, YSL, etc. If you're not being associated with wealth, what are you associating yourself with? 

Don't even think of questioning me if it doesn't pertain to business, either, because that's what we're all about here. In fact, don't even ask me a question if you're not ready for my answer and follow-up question [QAQ is a proven sales tactic used to keep one person in control of the conversation]. Any questions? 

Whoa, whoa, whoa where are you going? We were about to give you your own team! You've really been demonstrating management qualities lately, so to leave now would be a waste of all that hard work you've put in. You weren't as successful before we gave you this opportunity. Remember what we talked about? The riches, the success, the security? This happens to everyone, just stick around until you close something else and that rush will come back. 

You're a valuable asset to this company, primarily because your value is helping us acquire more assets, but what did I tell you about asking questions?

Springtime Cannoli Cake

The other day I was trying to come up with a dessert to serve my beloved. His favorite sweet treat is a cannoli while I love anything in cake form with cream cheese frosting. I decided to combine these two concepts into one super simple treat. Instead of making cannoli dough and frying it, I chose to make only the filling and spread it over a slice of pound cake (you can use homemade or store bought…I chose the latter!) For this cannoli “icing” I just mixed a bit of mascarpone and ricotta cheese together and added a touch of confectioners sugar (I don’t like it too sweet), vanilla and orange zest. For extra pop I topped the cake off with fresh rasberries, the colors were amazing! You could also use strawberries, blackberries, preserved lemons or any bright fruit you love. Want to take it to the limit? Just slightly toast the pound cake slices before topping with the filling…It is sooo good! -Christine

Style

Wooster

Style has been a big part of The Leisure Study since its inception. Style is personal. It's a set of beliefs. Fashion is an idealology, created by retailers, as a means of business. Fashion is something so old it's new again. It's your parents laughing at the $160 sweater you bought because they have the same one in their closet that's 30 years-old (well broken-in and probably more bad ass) and bought it for $50 bucks, hand-sewn.

Zen Buddhism suggests, "We are all two things: what others see us as being, and what we see ourselves as being." Although all monks wear the same maroon robes, that is great style advice (technically, they're ahead of the Italians and cartoon characters in the uniform dressing ideal*). You have to be comfortable with yourself to know what you want to project. You don't have to follow every fashion blog to be stylish, but street pictures exemplify great usage of patterns, textures, colors, etc. for those with an advanced sense of haberdashery. Incorporating what you see on the Internet into you takes a great sense of self. If you simply copy and paste outfits worn by others into your closet, you're accumulating costumes. You

I bet you like your cucumbers spicy

The Leisure Study's resident chef, Christine Collins, freshly imported [via interweb] from The Cedar Kitchen in Phili. If you're in the area and hungry, hire her! She makes delicious ubiquitous dishes like this Siracha Spiced Cucumber Salad. Takes 10 minutes and serves 2-4. Get some.

Ingredients:

• 2 cucumbers, halved and sliced (If you use a garden cucumber, not english style, make sure you peel them, seeding is optional!)
• 3 tablespoons sesame oil
• 3 tablespoons rice vinegar
• 2 tablespoons soy sauce (Tamari or Ponzu sauce work great as well!)
• 2 tablespoons Siracha (less if you don’t like spice…More if you love it!)

Be Your Best You

Jazz musician Jason Marshall sums up why you should look your best in a minute and 20 seconds.

Fuck Bracketology

March. A month typically associated with spring and college basketball. Emails invites are flooding inboxes and office pools are recruiting all employees to feel the excitement of March Madness and picking a winning bracket.

Spare me how much you like the cinderella stories, the upsets, the pageantry, the support for your alma mater (has it been confirmed that you actually graduated from there, anyways?), the bullshit. March Madness is about one thing. Money. Pretty much like the rest of the NCAA and higher education in general.

So throw $10 bucks in a pool and laugh at the fact that for one month out the year gambling isn't frowned upon, but celebrated with blatant public participation. Which team of student-athletes do you have winning in the first round?

drawing courtesy of Elitistjerksports.com

The NCAA merchandising booths are stockpiling cash and credit card reciepts at event sites. Advertising dollars are pouring in and the first two days of the tourney, typically taken off work by sports fans for the non-stop stretch of college hoops on television. There is betting of all different sizes and strengths during the second half of March. All of it on amateur athletes, most of whom are just trying to get some exposure to go pro. All of it accepted by society, especially because those with no knowledge can participate, just fill out the bracket. Most of it resulting in shitty basketball (that is until the sweet 16 onward).

But what else is there to watch? NBA or NHL regular season games or spring training baseball (if there is a TV broadcast available).

The NCAA has slowly taken over the holiday season with football's BCS Bowl Championship Series which is code for 30 bowl games means 30 sponsors and assloads of advertising money. March rolls around, there is no ratings competition with any pro leagues, so the NCAA holds a 64-team tournament that is chosen not just based on merit, but also on preference.

The Day Sports Died

My sports teams are better than your sports teams. It's not anybody's fault, simply the byproduct of living in Massachusetts and going to college in Miami. Timing is everything, as is being in the right place at the right time.

From my senior year of high school through my senior year of college, I thought I had seen it all. Chronologically, it goes something like this [starting at the beginning of the millennium]: Miami Hurricanes win college baseball title, Miami Hurricanes football goes 13-0 and wins national champioship, New England Patriots win Super Bowl over highly favored St. Louis Rams, Miami football loses national championship to Ohio State in overtime on pass interference call, Patriots win second Super Bowl against Panthers, Boston Red Sox lose ALCS Game 7 to New York Yankees on Aaron 'Fuckin' Boone's walk-off home run, Patriots win third Super Bowl against Phili Eagles, Red Sox win first World Series in 86 years, on an 8-game win streak, after being down 4-3 in the 9th inning to the Yankees, Game 4 of the ALCS, trailing 3-0 in the series and on the verge of being swept out of the playoffs.

It was quite a run.

Throw in the Giants snapping the Patriots perfect season in '07 on a David Tyree miracle catch, the 2008 Champion Boston Celtics beating their rival, the LA Lakers, for their NBA-record 17th title, the 2011 Boston Bruins winning the Stanley Cup, and there is a legitimate case to made that I've experienced the emotional gambit as a sports fan.

And that doesn't include putting a friendly wager on things. (shuddering at the thought)

She brought chocolates

Fresh off her People's Choice Award Win at the Phili Chili Bowl, here's Chef Christine of The Cedar Kitchen: 

Oh boy, have I got a recipe for all you chocolate lovers out there! This chocolate tart is so phenomenally easy to make, and doesn’t involve any baking at all (ok, well 10 minutes for the crust, but that’s it!) You can make this dessert a day in advance, and it will only take you about 20 minutes from beginning to end. To give it a little twist I added orange zest, but I think this dessert would be lovely with lemon or lime as well. Serve this with a dollop of whipped cream and lots of spoons, I promise you won’t have any leftovers!

Velvety Chocolate Tart with Orange Zest (Prep: 5, Cook: 20, Serves: 6-8)

Ingredients

• 5 oz of chocolate graham crackers
• 6 tablespoons butter
• 1 cup heavy cream
• 1 bag semi-sweet chocolate chips, about 12 oz
• 2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
• 1 orange, zested (have extra for topping)
• whipped cream, for garnish

Instructions